This is NOT Making Sense?!
Title: This is NOT Making Sense?!
Part: 1 of 2
Fandom: Dragonball Z
Disclaimer: No ownership implied, no profit gained. This is a fanwork.
Characters/Pairings: Cast, OCs
Summary: Stupid but funny DBZ fic written to get the Mary-Sue out of my system. It was supposed to turn into a big long epic of really fun stuff that would eventually tie into other original works of mine and explain the entire megaverse. However, I think it's even more entertaining to leave it as is, with the ending given.
Notes: This stands alone as random insanity and will not be updated.
It was sunny Sunday morning, early summer, and the air was still somewhat crisp and cool as blew through an open upstairs window. Razza Kalloway did the only thing left on what yesterday seemed to be an endless list of things to be done: balancing the checkbook.
Razza, more commonly referred to as Kalloway, since it makes her seem at least vaguely dangerous, sighed as she pulled out bank statements and scratch paper to do math on. She worked with computers almost every other second of her life - she relished a chance to work something out on paper. Only halfway into the second column of numbers, her pencil moved to the margin and began tracing an outline.
The outline quickly became a body and Kalloway let out a louder sigh. That man. She'd loved him her entire life, she was sure, and as soon as she had the face roughly sketched in, she added a little word bubble.
"Kalloway, you are pathetic", she said as she wrote.
"Every chance you get, you watch him and his family, and his friends. You're crazy!" she said, leaning back in the chair. "You're also using a strange monologue to open this fic. You should be talking about something domestic, like brownies."
Her watch beeped suddenly, bringing the woman out of her reverie. She quickly put a vent in the window, and ran out of the room, down the hall, and quite literally jumped down the entire flight of stairs on her way out the door.
Gohan was not tackling his checkbook, instead, his object of contempt was his homework. The 25 year old just had a couple semesters of college left before he could become a teacher. He was attending West City University and was staying at Capsule Corp to avoid a lengthy commute. While 25 may seem a bit old to be finishing up college, especially for someone as bright as Gohan, a couple things happened which caused him to take a couple brief sabbaticals from his education. Those will come up later though, for now...
Gohan doodled idly instead of working on a rough draft of an essay. A twenty page typed rough draft that was due on Wednesday. He had gotten writer's block on page three and had now completed a rather well done sketch of Videl and himself in their Saiyaman costumes, battling some great evil that was currently just squiggles.
Suddenly, there was a knock on his suite door. He stubled out of his study, through the small living room, and opened the door. There stood Vegeta, who looked quite irritated.
"About time" he said, looking at the confused Gohan. "Why aren't you ready?"
"Ready for what?" Gohan asked, quickly trying to remember what he was supposed to be doing.
"Stupid." Vegeta said. "Go change clothing and be downstairs in five minutes or Trunks and I will leave without you."
That's about when it struck Gohan. It was Sunday. Sparring day in the mountains. How could he have forgotten? It was basically the only time he saw his family anymore, even when they visited CC, he was usually too caught up in school work.
"Okay Vegeta" Gohan said, but Vegeta was already halfway down the hallway, mumbling to himself.
Gohan closed the door and turned, walking back through the vaguely messy living room and into his bedroom. He dug through several drawers before finding what he was looking for, his newest version of the Piccolo outfit.
Five minutes later, Gohan was downstairs with Vegeta and Trunks, who was now 16. While Vegeta and Gohan really hadn't changed much, Trunks had grown into a handsome young man. He'd grown his hair long to see if he could emulate his Mirai self. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he was actually rather in love with his Mirai self, the consequences of which, he didn't even want to fathom.
The three of them flew to the mountains quickly. Vegeta was quite looking forward to trying out a couple new attacks he'd been working on. He smirked mid-flight. Kakarrot wouldn't be able to beat him today.
Speaking of the aforementioned saiya-jin, both he and his youngest son had just finished breakfast and were now piling dishes in the sink. They were something to deal with later, of course.
"Are you going to spend the entire day fighting Vegeta?" Goten asked. He was 15 now, and had grown to look even more like his father and less like that GT git with the bad hair.
Goku smiled at Goten, giving him a friendly cuff on the arm. "Do you want me to beat on you first?" He teased.
Goten's face turned to one of slight panic. He could make it to Super Saiya-jin 2 now, but was obviously no match for his father.
"That's alright - I don't mind watching you fight Vegeta all day." Goten said quickly. He *did* train with his father most of the rest of the time, one day off definitely wouldn't hurt. Besides, he looked forward to some extra time with Trunks. Since the purple-haired bishonen *was* a year older, the pair rarely had classes together. Hell, their lockers weren't even in the same hallway.
And besides, thought Goten, if I ask nicely, I bet I can stay at Capsule Corp. tonight, school night or not.
The red-haired woman seemed to move like a phantom, from shadow to shadow, as she crossed the terrain to where the Z fighters gathered to spar. Well, except for when she tripped over her untied bootlace. That was pretty damned ungraceful.
"Forkin' Shoelace!" Kalloway muttered under her breath as she corrected the problem. She was wearing black army-style boots which laced midway up her calves, along with slightly over-sized and very worn bell-bottom jeans. Her shirt was a pale green, almost mint colored work shirt which was tied in a knot underneath her breasts. While she didn't have the classic anime-cleavage she should for this fic, her breasts were ample enough for her. Besides, the damn things got heavy sometimes as is.
Oh, and Kalloway also wore a baseball cap, dark blue, with her self-created SKZ Design logo embroidered on the front. SKZ was the name of her website design company - Number of employees: 1. But it helped pay bills, and was quite fun in the meantime.
The cap also managed to squash Kalloway's bangs over most of her face, in a somewhat street-urchin-cute-enough-to-take-home fashion. Yes, this is important, and there will be a test later. Well, maybe no test, but the hat is important. Really. Trust me.
Anyway, enough about Kalloway, other than one last thing: Kalloway made her way safely to the bush she usually hid in to watch the Z fighters spar. She'd been watching them on and off for years, especially the object of her affection, the one she'd known since she was three years old.
Now Gohan is not psychic, but he'd had enough 'power awakenings' that he had begun to get certain and very useful hunches about things. He had a hunch this would not be an ordinary day. But that was all he knew.
And promptly after thoughts of definitely-not-impending-doom, his mind picked a new subject - Piccolo, whom he hoped to see that day. He also wondered if Videl would make it. She was currently working for the West City Police Department, but normally had Sunday mornings off. She still lived in Satan City, of course, and usually made the weekend spars. Though she was no match for any of the gang, other than perhaps Yamcha, she enjoyed the workout.
Within a few minutes and some instant transmission, six fighters had converged to spar. Gohan was somewhat disappointed Videl wasn't present, but he knew he'd see her tomorrow. Videl had a patrol near the University and walked through a couple times per day. And Monday's were Cookie Day - strange as it seems, a former student witthh a habit of over-baking brought in excess cookies every Monday and handed them out, smiling as she gave Gohan an extra handful, for himself and "That nice Officer Videl."
Food. But sparring first, then the picnic baskets that had been brought.
You know how everything on Dragonball gets decided, right? Rock Paper Scissors!! (Sad, isn't it?) Anyway, the first set of spars was determined by the above fashion (those who won the most fighting first). And the lucky winners were...
Drink Lemonade! Tip Your Waitress!