Kalli's Journal

Staff Information!
Hit Banners & Awards!

Contact Info

No Hero Indeed

Nights were the worst. Nights, which seemed unending in parts of the Coliseum where it was between twilight and darkness most of the time anyway, and all of the thoughts that went along with them...

No longer was Cloud worried about himself during the sleeping hours. Instead he wondered about others - about those Sora had mentioned: Aerith and Cid, Leon and Yuffie...

And about those that Sora hadn't mentioned, like Sephiroth. If, of course, Sephiroth was real.

It seemed odd, in a way, that he wasn't quite sure. But some of his other memories were a bit off, too. He didn't quite know where he'd been. He didn't quite know why he wanted to be a hero when he was no hero indeed.

But there, lingering at the edge of every thought and action, was Sephiroth.

He could remember the man as he grew up, older, willing to act as a mentor-- no, willing to... Cloud rolled over in bed, unsure, and hating the feelings that welled up inside of him when he tried to force memories.

Fantasies were better. More troublesome too, but better.

Sephiroth had been there. Again and again as Cloud grew older. He remembered. He thought he remembered. It was a mess. Maybe he was just convincing himself that Sephiroth existed.

Maybe if he kept waiting.

Cloud wasn't sure at all.

Just that for the time being... he was bound to Hades and for once, he was just going to try to do his current job and survive it and then head onward. Maybe Sephiroth would be there. Maybe...

He rolled again, and pulled his pillow over his head. Sleep would be nice at any time. At least he couldn't feel all awkward over his dreams. Because those were merely dreams.

There was a noise a moment later, strange, something that Cloud thought of as a crackling, but not quite.

He rolled and pulled the pillow away.

The only light in the room was a dying candle trapped in a glass lamp, but it was more than enough to illuminate silver hair and green eyes.

Cloud gasped. "Sephiroth..."

His unexpected guest nodded.

"You're real..." Cloud mumbled, unhappy for having doubted himself.

"To you," Sephiroth replied, leaning over Cloud and not allowing him to sit up. He pinned Cloud to the bed a moment later, drawing himself onto it slowly and purposefully.

"I missed you," Cloud managed before Sephiroth's mouth covered his and trapped him in a kiss that was better than anything he'd imagined or remembered or anything else.

Sephiroth didn't say anything when he pulled away, instead opting to make short work of Cloud's clothing. Probably closer to the memories, Cloud thought, than the fantasies. Maybe. Maybe he was wrong.

"You've been unhappy here?" Sephiroth questioned, looking up to meet Cloud's gaze when he had his hand just above Cloud's growing erection. Cloud couldn't quite hold in a little whimper that hopefully conveyed that he needed to be touched. Friction, pressure, something to cure the tiniest bit of ache and then maybe he could answer.

"Only a bit," Cloud managed, quickly, as a black-gloved hand ran his length. "Ah..."

"And yet you're staying..."

"I have work to do," Cloud replied, the last words cracking as Sephiroth continued touching him.

Sephiroth's mouth curved up into a strange little smile that lasted only until his descended on Cloud, kissing him and making Cloud open his mouth so their tongues could meet. It was bliss, though Cloud couldn't help wanting more. Sephiroth's weight on him, black leather against his bare skin, was just barely enough after a moment.

Sephiroth pulled his gloves off slowly, setting them beside Cloud's head as he shifted to sit upright. Dazed, Cloud didn't move. How many nights had he ached for this? How many nights had he ached wondering if he was even remembering things that were real?

He didn't hesitate to spread his legs after Sephiroth reached to grab a bottle of oil from a nearby shelf. This wasn't what Cloud thought it was for, but it would work perfectly.

"I..." Cloud wasn't entirely sure what he wanted to say. Just that he was so excited and relieved and...

"Nnn?" Sephiroth looked at him, same little smile on his face as he poured a bit of oil down over Cloud's own erection and reached to stroke it again. Cloud cried out, unable to help arching against Sephiroth's hand. With more oil running over him and down between his legs, Cloud could feel Sephiroth's fingers pressing against his entrance.

"Nothing," Cloud mumbled. "Just... please..."

Sephiroth nodded and calmly pushed those fingers in, stretching and spreading the slick oil. Cloud sucked in his breath, trying to relax and adjust. It wasn't bad, just a bit unfamiliar. It had been awhile since...

All those memories...

Soon, the motions of Sephiroth's fingers inside of him began to feel very good and he was ready to lose himself when Sephiroth drew away. There were a few motions that Cloud didn't catch, and the sound of a zipper... More oil...

Those green eyes were fixed on him as Sephiroth positioned himself, head of his erection pressing ever so lightly against the ring of muscle that was ready to take it. Cloud just nodded. He couldn't be more ready.

With one motion - Sephiroth forward, dragging Cloud back to meet him and push his legs up further, they united. Both of them moaned, and Cloud finally saw true expression on Sephiroth's face. From there, it was a blur. Cloud reached between them to wrap a hand around his own erection, trying to keep pace with Sephiroth's thrusts.

He didn't last long - not when his thoughts kept looping back to past moments like this, not when Sephiroth was finally here and...

Grabbing for Sephiroth as he came, Cloud clung to Sephiroth's jacket and rode out his orgasm. He was probably making a mess, but he didn't care. Sephiroth never complained about it. And still shaking, he knew the telltale moans of Sephiroth's own orgasm.

He tried to remember how to breathe and nearly got it wrong the first time. Sephiroth didn't rest inside of him, instead pulling back and then draping himself over Cloud, kissing him, keeping him there, exhausted.

Cloud knew he'd sleep. He hoped Sephiroth would stay with him, but... He couldn't remember a time that Sephiroth had. He felt Sephiroth's weight lift, and then a chill and then...

He blinked once, twice - when had the candle burned out in its little glass prison? Cloud sat up and looked around, but he was alone. Had... he dreamed all of that? No... he was still naked and sticky and... Cloud flopped back on the bed and pulled the blankets over himself.

At least he could be sure of one thing in his muddled existence - Sephiroth was real.

To him.