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Title: "Foaming Meat Probe - The Ficlet!"
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts
Disclaimer: No ownership implied, no profit gained. This is a fanwork.
Characters/Pairings: Sora, Riku, The Author
Rating: AA
Summary: Riku searches for fanfiction.
Notes: The worst euphemism that ever popped up on the mailing list. Crack!AU from college where everyone lived with me.

"What are you doing?" Sora asked as he walked into Kalloway's bedroom. The woman was gone for the day - probably still standing in line to sell back her myriad of textbooks that mainly had acted as something to prop up her printer - so Riku had claimed her laptop.

"Reading fanfiction," Riku replied, barely looking away from the screen.


"Why not? Kalli's given us some good stuff to read. I'm..." But Riku was cut off before he could get any further.

"And how many good stories have you found so far?" Sora pulled up a stray milk crate to sit on and leaned over Riku's shoulder. "Kal told me most of the stuff out there wasn't worth reading."

"This is my first search."

"Sora?" Riku looked over at Sora, who was rolling on the floor, laughing hysterically. "It wasn't that bad."

At that exact moment a very exhausted Kalloway stumbled into the apartment. After setting her now-empty backpack on a kitchen chair, she curiously tiptoed to her bedroom.

"What's going on?" she asked, wondering what could possibly make anyone laugh like that.

"I was looking for fanfiction on the internet," Riku replied.

Sora tried to say something, but couldn't get his breath back.


"Some of these stories are rather bad. I mean, the dialogue, the descriptions..." Riku glared at Sora a moment before looking back to Kalloway.


Just then, Sora took a deep breath before spitting out the one phrase that had sent him into hysterics: "Foaming Meat Probe!"

Riku stepped over the pair of them, still laughing, ten minutes later when he decided it might be safer to swear off fanfiction for life.


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Disclaimer: I don't own it, I'm just playing with it. All titles and characters belong to their respective creators and companies.