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Absolutely Fucked

Leon almost put down his first cup of coffee but stopped short. He could see the kitchen light reflecting on the counter-top.

He could see the counter-top.

Despite all of the repairs that Leon knew how to do and was quite capable of doing, his own house had always been on the bottom of the priority list. Working sixteen hours in a day was nothing new. And for the last two days, that was exactly what he had done.

Cid's team was stealing the show for the day, however, re-routing a part of the electrical grid and forcing the last of the stagnant hydroelectric generators into action.

So Leon had the day off. Finally.

And living with Riku hadn't been so bad because he had barely seen Riku. But Riku had apparently stayed busy. The fistfuls of munny left on the counter each morning had done more than just feed his guest - so far the drooping shutters were no longer drooping but also sporting a new coat of paint. The counters were cleaned, the dishes put away, and the floor scrubbed.

The basement was even half-cleaned, which really was the nail in his coffin - at least a quarter of the things in the basement had come with the house. He didn't even know what was down there. Cloud had stuffed some things down there. Yuffie had asked to store... something.

He did want to set his coffee down... After looking around for a minute, he found a trivet and hoped for the best.

Riku was earning his keep, honestly and with enthusiasm that Leon couldn't even imagine.

They hadn't talked. Not about that moment or about anything. Leon had just given Riku the couple of sets of clothing that Sephiroth had provided and gone off to find Aerith and ask her to stop once a day to check on things.

"You're home."

Leon turned, smiling almost without thinking when he saw Riku at the edge of the kitchen. A moment later his brain processed that Riku was wearing only a pair of boxer shorts.

"You... cleaned."

Riku nodded, navigating the kitchen with practiced ease and getting a coffee mug for himself. "I don't have a job. Yet. So... I'll try to earn my keep."

"You don't have to." Leon took another hard swallow of his coffee. He needed to wake up a little more before dealing with anything.

"I'm not a charity case," Riku reminded him. "Besides, I have been going out, too. Aerith keeps stopping by and yesterday she bought me some clothing. Including underwear."

"Didn't think you wanted to borrow Sephiroth's drawers," Leon noted. "Sorry."

Chuckling, Riku paced along the outside wall of the kitchen. "Okay, you have a point. And hey, I'm sorry about the other day."

"Other day?" Obviously he needed more coffee - no sooner were the words out of his mouth than he knew exactly what Riku was talking about.

"Yeah. That, um, moment. I mean..."

Leon knew - the exact thought had struck him the day before - why he'd hesitated. Why he should hesitate. "If I touch you, I want to be touching you - not some memory or fantasy or anything else. I'm not sure I can do that."

For a second Riku frowned. But after a few seconds, the frown turned more to an introspective wince. Riku closed his eyes.

"You're right. I know you're right. And..."

"We'd only be cheating ourselves," Leon concluded. "I spent a lot of time yesterday thinking about it."

A minute of silence passed between them as Leon poured himself another cup of coffee.

"Can we spar today?" Riku asked finally. "Since we didn't get to that first day?"

"Yeah," Leon agreed. "One more cup and I think you need pants."

"Sephiroth's bondage pants," Riku commented, laughing. "Did you pick those out on purpose? Or is his entire wardrobe made entirely of..."

Apparently, Leon decided, the look on his face had answered the question before Riku could ask it.

"Cloud picked everything out, actually," Leon continued, fairly sure he didn't have the facial expression for 'Okay, Cloud picked everything out, except for the black t-shirt with the artistic holes in the sides because I bought that and Sephiroth never wears it much anyway, probably because I bought it, but I never, ever need to tell you that'.

Five minutes later, Riku was wearing just that shirt, stretching and not bothering to pull down the bottom when it hiked upward. Not that Leon minded the view of Riku's stomach.

"We can go out to the Ravine Trail," Leon said as he pulled on his jacket. The morning was still cool and even on the warmest days, he felt naked without it. "It's too early for Cloud and Sephiroth to be up, anyway, if Cloud isn't working."

"I haven't seen them yet," Riku admitted. "I just remember them from before. When..."

Leon looked up from where he was pulling his gunblade from its case. His fingers had trailed halfway down the blade, paused on cool metal to see just what had made Riku fall silent.

"Riku?" He didn't like the look on Riku's face. More bad memories.

"Why do you trust me?" Riku asked suddenly. "You know what I've done and what I'm capable of!"

Leon smiled. "Because you're here. You're free to do what you want here. I don't think that any plan of Maleficent's would have you cleaning my basement or painting my shutters."

"Free..." Riku repeated before smiling. "I am, aren't I? Free of everything. Even fear."

"Fear?" Leon questioned, grabbing his gunblade and nodding in the direction of the door.

"That I'd do something," Riku replied. "Either to Kairi or Sora or just their wedding in general. I was afraid that I'd let my jealousy get the better of me. That I would finally march around town with both Tidus and Selphie on my arms, proving how much of a damned reject I really am. I..."

"Hey," Leon said as he closed the door behind them, curious just when it had been scrubbed clean of moss and mud, "you aren't one of the bad guys anymore. Remember that."

"I think I could still take you in a fight," Riku replied, a smile on his face. "Definitely Sora... Aunt Freya was doing better with Maleficent than he was."

"I'm not surprised," Leon commented, trying not to chuckle. He knew that Sora tended to let his skills slip at the worst times. And certainly he was not one to break patterns.

"Are there any Burmecians living in this town?" Riku asked a moment later. "I've seen quite a few other races, but..."

"Burmecians?" Leon asked. The name seemed familiar, but not overly so. Traverse Town had been full of books, though, all of which had helped him pass the time.

"Aunt Freya is Burmecian," Riku explained. "She's not my real aunt, I mean. She and my Uncle Fratley found me while traveling near Destiny Islands."

"We have Viera and the faerie-folk, and moogles..."

"Viera!" Riku exclaimed with a laugh. "Close, but not quite - imagine a Viera crossed with King Mickey and..."

Both men burst out laughing, because despite neither one wanting to admit it, they had just imagined the same scenario.

"Okay, not like that," Riku said. They were crossing through the beginnings of the final phases of restoration around the castle, on the way out the ravine. "But I mean, a physical cross. I think that's why I was always so comfortable around the king. He just reminded me of home."

"That's the first time you mentioned an uncle."

"Oh, yeah." Riku frowned again. "One day he got a letter from an old friend, asking for help. He told Freya that he'd be back before she knew he was gone. And he never came back. I never forgot that - I think that's why it was so hard to go back home four years ago. Poor Aunt Freya - we just kept leaving her alone."

"She never went to look for him?" Leon asked. They'd arrived. He pulled his gunblade from its holster.

"Sometimes, but she never left me alone for long. She refused to leave me. And I... I just left her again, didn't I? She knew I was so frustrated - staying in town, but..." Riku reached into sub-space for his keyblade, pulling it forth almost forcefully.

"But she saw you go, right? With Maleficent. I'm sure as a warrior, she thought it was a noble sacrifice to make. For your friends. Because you care about them and aren't the awful person that you keep thinking you are." Leon took a few steps back, smiling. He remembered the Burmecians now - split into separate factions of peace-loving pacifists and highly skilled fighters. He didn't doubt which category Riku's aunt fell into, and the warrior's spirit within him flared.

"I'll see her again, someday," Riku replied. "I think you'd get along well with her."

Nodding, Leon gestured for Riku to come at him.

At least Riku's muscle wasn't all show. Leon had to step back to stay on his feet from the force of Riku's first blow. But whatever Riku was used to facing, it wasn't a gunblade. Normally, Leon didn't have speed on his side, but he did seem to be faster than Riku, despite not being stronger.

"Not bad for an old man," Riku taunted when he stumbled blocking one of Leon's swings.

"Old man?" Leon repeated, wanting to either pull the trigger once or throw a fireball. But neither was polite, not at close range, and he didn't want to actually hurt Riku, just teach him a little respect.

At least he knew he wasn't pulling his parries any longer.

The sun was beating down on them when Leon paused to cast his jacket aside, too warm to keep his arms covered. Riku was sweating as well, as he stood at the ready.

Leon knew one thing - Riku had better damned well be on his side, because only Cloud or Sephiroth would be capable of taking the young man down. If they were also on his side that day.

But if, at any time, all three of them had temporarily defected, he could also assume that there would be no literal swords involved and the only thing he'd really lose would be his clothing.

He didn't mind the thought as he pulled up the hem of his shirt to wipe his forehead.

"Getting tired?" Riku asked, finally giving up his stance and sliding over to Leon's side.

"You?" Leon asked back, smirking to see Riku breathing so heavily.

"Eh," Riku replied. "Guess it's about time you bought me lunch."

"I could do that," Leon agreed. "Because I rather like what you're doing with the basement."

"That's a hard bargain," Riku commented. "But I am developing an addiction to those noodles. I ate at another little place yesterday and..."

"Not as good?"

"Not as good," Riku echoed. "So it's settled, then."

"Yeah." Leon still liked watching keyblades slide back into their nothingness. He'd never needed that sort of magic and being able to do it unconsciously like the keyblade bearers was far beyond what he knew his ability to be.

A few steps back towards town and Riku was at his side, matching his steps but not saying anything.

"What?" Even if it was a bad thing to ask, it had to be better than the silence.

"What you said," Riku replied. "I still think I'm the selfish one. Even if I haven't quite gotten anything I want. And I bet they all think I'm a hero now. I'm not."

"There's no cut and dried path to being a hero," Leon said. "Ask Cloud."

"You tell me to ask Cloud about everything."

Leon shrugged. "He has better stories than I do. Or have you heard them all?"

"No," Riku said. "I didn't really... talk to Cloud much. I had other things on my mind then."

"Does being here make you uncomfortable? The castle?" Leon glanced up, to where the structure loomed above them.

Riku followed Leon's gaze, pausing and staring. "Yes. And no. I don't know."

"That's not a bad answer." Leon saw no reason to linger, instead continuing towards town. Riku would catch up.

He just wished that it would have taken a little less than ten minutes before Riku dropped his weight onto the chair beside him just like he had that first day.

Ten minutes. Leon couldn't help feeling a little wary about that, but he also knew that what Sora had told him only scratched the surface of what Riku had gone through, especially in that castle.

Still, the idea of hiring out at least Paine to do a little spying seemed like a fairly good idea.

"The same as last time?" Leon hadn't even noticed the black-haired waitress bounding up to attack Riku with her contagious smile.

"Yes, ma'am," Riku replied, smiling back.

"Not 'ma'am'!" the waitress chided as best she could without laughing. "You call me 'miss' next time or I won't get you anything."

And before Riku could reply, she had vanished back to the kitchen.

"She's weird," Riku said after another few seconds.

"I think she's related to Yuffie," Leon said. "Really. I think she's related to Yuffie. But I'm not sure how."

"Is everyone here related?" Riku reached to toy with the salt shaker. "Or just the interesting people?"

"It isn't a big town," Leon commented. "We're still learning how to get by without Ansem's assistance."

"He knew how to manipulate things," Riku said. "Most of the time, anyway. But he was too easily blinded."

Not willing to question that bit of knowledge, Leon simply sat back to watch Riku.

Ten minutes. That could have been a lifetime.

"We should actually go grocery shopping."

"We?" Leon asked.

"You. I need a job. I can do anything," Riku added, as if somehow that had escaped Leon's notice.

"I'll talk to Cid," Leon said, wondering if it was such a good idea. "If anyone will know a good place for you to work, it'll be him."

"I can do it," Riku said quickly. "I'm not going to be a burden on you."

"Here you boys go," the waitress interjected, unloading plates in front of them. "Enjoy!"

"Two more, if you don't mind."

Leon would know that voice anywhere. Cloud.

He looked up to see both Cloud and Sephiroth standing there, each with a hand on the two empty chairs at the table.

"Sit down," Leon said quickly. As strange as lunch with the pair was, it was almost welcome after spending the morning alone with Riku.

"You're easy to find," Cloud said as he sat. "You're looking good, Riku."

"You too, Cloud," Riku replied, seemingly torn between his lunch and Cloud's attention. Somehow Leon was instantly doubtful that all the pair had between them was idle talking.

He flicked his gaze over to Sephiroth, who was silently appraising the situation.

"He looks good in that," he finally said, gesturing in Riku's direction. Leon nodded, remembering that Riku had slid into one of the borrowed outfits. Somehow, he'd forgotten. Or not forgotten, but at least not let it drill into his mind that Riku was wearing the same clothing that he'd once happily peeled from Sephiroth's body, tasting and kissing the skin beneath when Cloud had been off on long jobs.

"Yeah," Leon replied. And then he decided to eat, as opposed to even trying to carry on a conversation that he knew would just get him in even further over his head.

He had almost mentioned that Aerith had been kind enough to take Riku out to buy underwear.

He was fairly glad that he hadn't.

And until the black-haired waitress slid plates in front of Sephiroth and Cloud, he'd done the best he could to ignore Cloud's fingers lingering on Riku's shoulder, twisted into silver-hair with some semblance of possession.

"So what brings you from your world?" Sephiroth asked, once silence had descended on the table and Cloud had decided to keep his hands to himself.

"It's a long story," Riku replied, looking almost helplessly over to Leon for some sort of help. "Probably longer than is worth telling."

"Sephiroth, are you familiar with the Burmecians?" Leon asked quickly. He knew that Sephiroth consumed knowledge, specifically on battle tactics, magic, and anything else within his scope of interest.

"Burmecians." The smile on his face was telling. "Noble warriors, skilled with weapons and magic. Once upon a time, hundreds of years ago, a small group of them helped save a nearby town of faerie-folk from a terrible monster. Since then, the name of their leader has been passed on amongst the fae as a sign of honor. Hela Crescent. My mother's half-sister was named Lucrecia Crescent as part of that tradition."

Riku choked on his drink, coughing long enough that their waitress was at his side, offering him another napkin and a good, firm smack on the back.

"Burmecians named Crescent," Riku finally managed, a wide-smile forming on his face. "Leon asked because I was raised by my aunt - Freya Crescent. A Burmecian."

"Then she must be a very strong woman," Sephiroth commented, glancing from Riku to Cloud. Leon wished he hadn't spoken. Obviously he hadn't managed to divert attention properly at all. "I would be honored to meet a Burmecian bearing the name of Crescent."

"Yeah," Riku said. "I've heard so many stories from her. But not one like that. Maybe she thought I wouldn't be interested. Or didn't want to encourage me to follow in her footsteps."

"She taught you to fight to protect yourself, didn't she?" Leon asked.

"And Sora and Kairi," Riku answered. "Because Sora was pretty wussy when he was younger. And Kairi... should have somehow been able to draw out some of her innate magic ability."

"There's a difference between potential and ability." All three men looked over at Cloud. "Some people have one or the other, and some have both."

"And some beg, borrow and steal theirs," Riku said coolly. "I know."

"Riku!"

Aerith stood in the doorway, waving.

Riku gestured for her to come over to the table.

"I hope no one minds," he said, "that I did promise Aerith that I would give her a hand this afternoon. She bought me, um, a few things and I promised hard physical labor in return."

"My flowers need fertilizer," Aerith said with an amused grin before leading a red-faced Riku out of the café.

"That was low," Sephiroth said, shaking his head.

"That was Aerith," Cloud corrected.

Leon excused himself, content to sort things in his basement for the remainder of the day.

The sound of the door softly opening, closing and locking just as he had turned off his bedroom light made the thought of sleep a little easier. Leon trusted Aerith with Riku, after all, but it had been getting a little late. Even if she had forced an entire cake on him.

From his bed, he could hear Riku moving around, into the spare room and back to the bathroom - quiet a moment before the shower turned on.

Leon chuckled, wondering if Aerith really had made Riku spread fertilizer all afternoon. If so, the shower was more than well deserved.

And then he fell asleep, or thought he fell asleep, because suddenly he knew that he was awake and that the much-more-familiar weight of Riku's body was sharing his bed.

"I'm home."

That could have been said from the doorway.

"Riku?" Leon asked, reaching over for the bedside lamp.

"Don't." A hand caught his. "I just... Lunch. Every time Cloud said something to me, you... You two really drifted, didn't you?"

"You're... I don't want to ruin something good by sleeping together," Leon protested. Riku's hand was warm, holding his and not letting go.

"But, Leon," Riku said, shifting on the bed so that Leon could feel his breath as he spoke, "you're the one who told me that this was a chance at freedom from expectations."

That was a good way of putting it, Leon decided, wishing he'd actually worded it as such. Except that...

"Expect nothing," Riku said. "I was thinking about it when I was with Aerith. Start with nothing, expect nothing, and... neither one of us will get hurt."

Leon remembered being twenty, when backwards, insane logic made perfect sense and when he would have agreed with Riku wholeheartedly.

And when Riku kissed him, he responded, opening his mouth to Riku's tongue and letting Riku nibble at his lower lip, drawing out a single kiss into an act that left him breathless.

He knew at that moment that in both senses of the word, he was fucked.

Absolutely fucked.

"Riku," he managed once he had his tongue back in his own mouth. "This..."

There was no point in bothering with any further protests. Not when the hand that wasn't still being held by Riku was tangled in Riku's hair. Not when he wanted to be naked. Not when the more he thought about it, the idea of having Riku as his, even for an infinitely small amount of time, made the ache between his legs increase tenfold.

"This would be easier if we were on the same side of the blankets."

Riku chuckled, letting go of Leon and slipping under the thin, spring blankets that Leon knew he'd need to wash in the morning. Reaching over to peel away night clothing, Leon was surprised to find just skin. No wonder he hadn't been allowed to grab for the light.

With nothing to stop him, Leon slid a hand down Riku's back, curiosity turning to lust when Riku let a soft moan escape from between his lips.

They kissed again, a mutual meeting of mouths and tongues to distract from hands almost nervously working together to take care of the pajama bottoms that Leon did have on. But elastic was a wonderful creation and pushed down to the end of the bed, the clothing in question was quickly forgotten about.

Riku pounced, forcing their bodies together as he pressed Leon flat on his back. Leon hissed as a hand slid along his erection to effectively knock away of the last remaining resolve that Leon might have had.

He groped at Riku, finding Riku's arousal and sliding his fingers over the slick tip before Riku pulled back.

"Not yet," Riku said. "I want to touch you first."

Leon swallowed hard, wondering just when and how Riku had learned this art. Certainly not with blushing, stammering Sora. No, as Riku trailed kisses down his chest and licked at his nipples, Leon was positive that Riku had gotten a more than proper instruction from his encounters with darkness.

Riku's tongue traced his navel, teasing lower but avoiding his arousal. Hands were on Leon's legs, but Leon knew that if he dared push Riku towards something he'd been protesting just minutes before, he wouldn't be able to look at himself in the mirror come morning.

He held his breath as Riku shifted, feeling the soft tickle of Riku's hair on his stomach at the same instant warm breath hit his erection. His breath came out as a moan, almost too loud as Riku's tongue teased at the tip, lapping up the tiny bead of fluid that had gathered before taking hardness deeper into his mouth.

"Ah... Riku..." Leon grabbed at the pillow, trying to find something to do with his hands that didn't involve pulling Riku's hair. He wanted to be touching Riku in the same way, kissing and tasting and licking and sucking. Riku's mouth was tempting him with a quick release, sheer pleasure as hands wandered to touch his scrotum and explore farther.

Not yet...

"Stop..." And Riku did, pulling away as though Leon's protest had physically injured him.

"Leon?"

"Not... just for a minute..." Leon grabbed for Riku, kissing him and probably leaving a bruise or two as their arms tangled and they slammed awkwardly onto the bed.

Riku chuckled. "Turn on the light?"

"I have some lotion," Leon said as he crawled over Riku to grab at the lamp on the bed-table, nearly knocking it over once before turning it on. He glanced down at Riku, surprised at Riku's blush.

Smiling, he grabbed the lotion and handed it to Riku.

"Okay?" Riku asked, eyes meeting Leon's and locking.

"Yeah," Leon replied as he closed his eyes for another kiss. He grasped at Riku's erection, stroking firmly and enjoying the moans vibrating in his own mouth as Riku's tongue found his.

He wanted to keep touching Riku - wanted to explore every inch of Riku's body, but when Riku broke the kiss to reach and push Leon's legs apart, Leon knew that he wouldn't be able to focus on anything but his own body and his own pleasure.

Far too long had passed since he'd been with anyone... as such. Even as Riku uncapped the lotion and smiled, Leon couldn't help an inward wince. The feel of slick fingers, however, teasing around his opening managed to chase away the last lingering bits of apprehension. And as one finger pressed inside of him, slowly, Leon could do nothing but moan. He closed his eyes, relaxing against Riku's hands as one stayed lightly stroking his arousal while he was stretched as gently as he could ever remember.

"Ready?" Fingers pulled back, and the hand on his erection paused.

Leon chuckled, wondering if there was a proper thing to say when being seduced by a gorgeous younger man. He nodded, hoping that his amusement wasn't being taken the wrong way. He opened his eyes to look into aqua, waiting for penetration.

He could feel Riku's erection against him, pressing gently against muscle that was quite willing to give.

"Yes," Leon whispered, hooking his legs around Riku to tempt him forward. And Riku finally thrust, closing his eyes and gasping, pausing halfway before shifting slightly to fully press himself into Leon's body.

He didn't want the moment to recover - didn't want anything other than the motion of the fullness within him. Riku caught on quickly, pulling back then thrusting - hard enough to move the bed against the wall and make the springs shudder and moan just as loudly as the noises both men made.

Leon noticed, but he didn't care. Riku was moving perfectly, arching back enough that he could stroke his own erection to match the rhythm even though he was damned sure that he would come just from watching Riku and listening to him, completely separate from the pleasure radiating through his body from where Riku's body joined his.

A few hard thrusts in an increasingly arrhythmic pattern told Leon all that he needed to know. He could release - stop holding back as his hands slid over his arousal.

"Ah!" Riku was watching him, watching him come. He closed his eyes, feeling one of Riku's hands on his much-too-sensitive erection to catch the last bits of his seed. And he knew that was all Riku needed, too, as he listened to Riku's moans a moment later.

For a minute they stayed joined, not speaking, just clinging to one another. Leon wanted to laugh, not at Riku's lack of breath but because somehow, he couldn't bring himself to think that he'd done anything too terrible.

Though that wasn't a new feeling either.

For a hot second, he hoped that he was dreaming.

But he knew that he wasn't.